Are You Giving Away Your Power?
Giving away your power robs you of mental strength. And it’s likely there are times in your life when you give people and circumstances power over you.
It can feel as if life is spinning out of control, and when we feel like this, it’s usually due to a loss of personal power. We then lose touch with our hopes, dreams, desires, courage and confidence, and all this undermines our happiness and fulfilment in life.
Giving away your power is one of the worst things you can do in this life. We have to hold on tight to our personal power and then use it to help us overcome challenges, hardship and adversity that life throws at us.
When we hand this power over to others or circumstances, we give them or it the ability to manipulate our emotions and steal our happiness in ways that are hard to come back from.
Are you feeling lost, or as though you don’t know who you are or what you want anymore? If the answer is yes, then you might be giving your personal power away.
Signs that you’re giving away your power
Recognising those areas of your life where you give away your power is the first step in taking it back.
Do you blame other people for your feelings?
Whether you insist your co-worker drives you crazy, or your cranky partner ruins your good mood, you’re giving away your power. It’s important to recognise that while other people can influence your emotions, they can’t force you to feel anything. Decide to take control over your mood and don’t let anyone drag you down or hold you back.
Do you waste time complaining?
Reliving how dreadful that meeting was or complaining about how much you must do tomorrow, gives unpleasant events power over your life. While problem-solving is a good use of your time, venting and complaining aren’t helpful at all. Commit to focusing on solutions, rather than dwelling on your problems.
Does your self-image depend on other people’s opinions of you?
If you only feel good about yourself when others hold you in high regard, or with the number of followers or likes on social media, you’ll become a people-pleaser. Even worse, you’ll never feel quite good enough because you can’t please everyone. Never let even just one person’s opinion of you determine your self-worth.
Do you try to blend in?
When self-doubt and fear creep in, it can be tempting to want to blend in with those around you. But trying to fit in with the crowd means changing who you really are to avoid attention or criticism. Don’t give other people the power to stifle your personality, your uniqueness. Dare to be yourself; be willing to stand out and shine your light bright.
Do you hold grudges?
Despite what you might think, holding a grudge doesn’t punish the other person. But wasting valuable time thinking about a person who wronged you, whether it’s right or wrong, takes away your ability to enjoy the moment in life. Choosing to let go of the hurt and anger, regardless of whether the person is remorseful, or who’s right, is the best way to take back your power. Be the bigger person and you will be rewarded with greater happiness.
Do you know your values?
If you aren’t clear what your values are, you’ll become a helpless passenger in this life, rather than a confident driver in your own life. You’ll struggle to know your priorities and you’ll be easily influenced by others. Commit to figuring out your top values, align to them and design a life that has meaning for you.
Do you have healthy boundaries?
Giving in to guilt trips, letting people waste your time, and refusing to speak up for yourself gives people power over you. Rather than blame others for forcing you to do something, recognise that you’re in charge. Establish healthy physical and emotional boundaries that leave you feeling in control of how you spend time and who you spend it with.
You can take back your power
You might not realise this, but many of the things you do so freely: saying ‘yes’ to things you should be saying ‘no’. Acting in ways that are not congruent with your Truth, just so you can get love, validation, and approval. Staying in places and relationships that are toxic, etc. are ways in which you give your power away.
I know how dangerous that is. I’ve done it a billion times. And why I wanted to share with your ways you can take back your power, be true to yourself again, and live the life you deserve to live.
If you recognise areas in your life where you’ve been giving away your power, commit to taking it back today. You only have so much time and energy in this life, so it’s important to use your resources wisely.
Accept full responsibility for the way you think, feel, and act. Empowering yourself is the key reaching your greatest potential. And to living a happier, healthier, fulfilled and conscious life.
A great way to take back your power is with my 3 Golden Gifts and Deeper Wisdom:
Golden Gifts
1. Say ‘No’ with conviction
Most people have no idea how dangerous it is to say ‘yes’ all the time. How unhealthy it is to constantly try to please everyone around you by betraying your own self. And even though we all fall into this trap from time to time, if you start saying ‘no’ when it’s needed and with conviction, not only will you take back your power, but you will also reclaim your right to life, to happiness, to purpose, and to love.
Deeper Wisdom:
The next time someone asks you for a favour, or asks you to do something for them, take a step back. Breathe, count to 10, and then consider your feelings. Is this something that you really want to do? If it is, what is driving that desire? Do you desire it for yourself? Or do you desire it because you want this person to like you, or approve of you?
Make the conscious decision to stop pleasing others and start identifying your own needs. Spend time with yourself and create space between you and the people you are most likely to acquiesce. Stop the process in its tracks and do that by committing (proactively) to the journey right now. These answers make a difference and signal where the true power lies.
2. Get back to you
You have to get back to the core of who you are, if you ever want to have a hope of taking your personal power back in this world. That means getting clear and specific about what makes you tick and getting proactive about aligning your values with the people and experiences that fill up your life. Stop chasing the image that other people are building and rebuild your vision of self from the ground up.
Deeper Wisdom:
Get back to the root of who you are, and those authentic aspects of self that bring you passion, strength, and courage. Invest in self-care, take an online course, or pick up those paintbrushes that have been hiding in the dark. Fall back in love with yourself and begin the journey back into the centre of your authentic self.
The more in touch with your core that you are, the clearer your future becomes. When our authentic needs and desires are within sight, we get our courage and our fortitude within sight too. Think about the last thing you were certain about. How hard did you fight for that thing? How determined did you become to stick up for it? The same goes for our lives. The better (and more honestly) we know ourselves, the more comfortable we become standing in our own personal power.
3. Step into freedom
So many of us yearn for freedom, but many of us find true freedom uncomfortable. That is because true freedom requires us to be fully responsible and accountable for our lives and the decisions we make. It’s far easier to blame others or blame your circumstances for everything that goes wrong. Taking responsibility for everything you get right. That’s something that can only come by leaning into freedom and reclaiming your personal power.
Deeper Wisdom:
Reshape your ideas on freedom and find comfort in setting out on your own. Get used to taking big steps independently. Travel solo, try something no one in your family has ever tried before. The more confident you get in hanging your feet out over the cliff’s edge, the easier jumping becomes.
Trust that you know what’s best for yourself. Trust that you have the ability and the resilience to manifest the life you want and overcome the hardships that will inevitably come along the way. We find ourselves when we push ourselves beyond the edge of the cliff, into the open air of freedom. Lean into your freedom and start taking back power for yourself and the future you’ve always wanted to build.
So, let’s summarise those Golden Gifts again:
- Say ‘No’ with conviction
- Get back to you
- Step into freedom
Life is challenging and the scariness of it all can often push us into giving away our power. When we find ourselves spinning out of control or otherwise lost, it’s often because we’ve placed our futures in the hands of someone else’s validation or external circumstances. If we want to find a way to lead happy and fulfilling lives, we have to take action for the sake of our futures and take back our personal power.
The best advice I can give you is to stop the process in its tracks and proactively commit to taking responsibility for your life and your choices. You have a right to be the person you want to be, and you need no one’s validation but your own. Chip away at the victim mentality that is holding you back and stand strong beside your ability to choose your own happiness. Spend some time setting boundaries, then make sure you communicate those boundaries to anyone who would take power from you.
We don’t owe anyone our lives or our joy. Get back to the root of who you are and get excited about the future by identifying all the choices you have left ahead. Freedom is daunting, but living a life defined by others is even more so. Find comfort in the discomfort of standing in your own power and use that to build a life that is authentically yours.
Take care to pay attention to what you feel you need in your life. Seeking support from a coach could be the thing you do different to finally find the peace you’ve been seeking.
I know how difficult it is to make changes or even consider making changes when you’re feeling anxious, depressed, burnt out and exhausted. This is where I can help, with my one-to-one coaching, I help people awaken their limitless higher potential, ignite their powerhouse, and move forward with divine, soul driven purpose.
To find out more, book a call with me: https://puravidayourlife.kartra.com/calendar/ThePuraVidaWayEnquiry
I help overwhelmed and unfulfilled people replace fear with faith, replace weakness with strength, and replace internal struggle with confidence to effectively claim their life back in just 3 months. So, they can ‘be more’, ‘do more’, and ‘have more’ and fully embody their inner warrior to breakthrough all that holds them back.
Are you ready to take your first step towards a happier, healthier, fulfilled and more conscious life?
Thank you for joining me and I look forward to seeing you again next week for Pura Vida Your Life Happenings for insight, inspiration and more Golden Gifts and Deeper Wisdom to help you live a happier, healthier and more conscious life.
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Until next time – Pura Vida!