Comparing yourself to others
Are You Comparing Yourself to Others?
You know you shouldn’t compare yourself to others. Yet, that’s often easier said than done. Job title, income, grades, house, and Facebook likes and so on; the number of categories in which we can compare ourselves to others is infinite. And so is the number of people we can compare ourselves to. In this blog, I’m going to look at this subject in more detail, and I will share 3 Golden Nuggets to help you improve your life straightaway:
- The grass is not always greener
- Accept where you are
- Start to love your past
Comparison is generally the fast track to unhappiness. It’s a recipe for misery. All it does is keep you focused on what you don’t like about yourself and your life.
You can be anything, but you can’t be everything. When we compare ourselves to others, we’re often comparing their best features against our average ones. It’s like being right-handed and trying to play an instrument with your left hand. Not only do we naturally want to be better than them, the unconscious realisation that we are not can often become self-destructive.
Unless you are the best in the world at something, then comparisons between people are a recipe for unhappiness. Not only are we unhappy, but other people may be as well. They are probably comparing themselves to you, maybe you’re better at networking than they are and they’re jealous. At worst, when we compare ourselves to others, we end up focusing our energy on bringing them down instead of raising ourselves up.
There is one thing that you’re better at than other people and that’s being you. This is the only game you can really win.
When you start with this mindset the world starts to look better again. No longer are you focused on where you stand in relation to others. Instead, your focus and energy are placed on what you’re capable of now and how you can improve yourself.
Life starts to become more about being a better version of yourself. And when that happens, your effort and energy go toward upgrading your personal operating system every day, not worrying about what your colleagues or friends are doing. You become happier, free from the shackles of false comparisons, and you are more focused on the present moment.
“Personality begins where comparison leaves off. Be unique. Be memorable. Be confident. Be proud.”
When you stop comparing and focus internally, you start being better at what really matters, which is being you. It’s simple but not easy.
The simple advice I can give you is just stop – STOP comparing yourself to others. I have 3 Golden Nuggets to share with you to help you make that happen.
Golden Nuggets
1. The grass is not always greener
When we focus on other people, we lose the time that could otherwise be invested in ourselves. We don’t grow green grass by focusing on our neighbour’s garden; we do it by nurturing our own garden.
Top Tip
So, instead of wasting time comparing your path to someone else’s, spend it investing, creating, and caring for your own path.
2. Accept where you are
You can’t change something unless you acknowledge it. So, instead of resisting or fighting where you are, come to peace with it.
Top Tip
Say yes to every part of your life, and from that place, make decisions that will move you in the right direction.
3. Start to love your past
Your life might have been messy and bumpy. It might have been coloured by mistakes, anxiety, and fear. I know mine was. But all those things were catalysts to help you become a better, wiser and a more courageous version of yourself.
Top Tip
So, embrace your story and how much you’ve grown from it. Be proud of what you’ve done and for wanting to create a better life for yourself.
So, let’s summarise those golden nuggets again:
- The grass is not always greener
- Accept where you are
- Start to love your past
Compare yourself with your goals. Look back to see how far you have come from where you were in the past.
All you have to do is strive to beat your best opponent, whose reflection you see in the mirror. Go beat him or her today.
If you have found this useful, then please share this with anyone you know who would also benefit to help them along their journey in life.
Thank you for joining me and I look forward to seeing you again next week for Pura Vida Your Life Happenings for insight, inspiration and more golden nuggets to help you live a happier and fulfilled life.
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Pura Vida!